Monday, January 9, 2012

Messenger's Report

Some of you may be familiar with Paris Bailey-Earm, known much better as “Beast.” Wait, that’s a stupid statement. Of course you’re familiar with him; you’re reading his blog.

The love he had for that Beauty of his (real name Helen Holmes) got him killed recently. He broke into the apartment of Mary Holmes (that’d be Bambi), which had become a Labyrinth thing of some sort. Anyway, he went in, and while we’re not entirely sure what happened inside there (considering that we, you know, weren’t in the Labyrinth ourselves), we found Bambi dead with her neck broken, and Beauty and Beast dead in each other’s arms, with no discernible cause (which is usually shorthand for “The Boss probably did it”).

A note was found on Beast’s body, which I’ve reproduced here:

I...I don't know why I'm writing this. I don't have anyone to carry on after me, no possessions to bequeath. I don't even know if I actually will die in there. I'm confident in my strength. What I'm not confident is the Creature staying away. My song might end very, very soon...but the melody will go on.

One way or another, no matter what happens to me, I'm heading in there. I'm finding the love of my life, alive or dead, and I'm ending Bambi, the one who took her.

Blog’s over, people. Nothing to see here. Move along.

-Don’t Shoot The Messenger-